On Facebook, I put my status as "got A, A, & A- on the tests she got back this week. If only these were my semester grades. At least I have Spring Break to look forward to! Btw: No SanFran, guys, sorry. =( Maybe HK." Someone responded, "whoa!! great grades!! good job!!" I came back with, "I'm at John Jay. It's not particularly hard. >.> Though I must say, I barely studied and correct answers just popped in my head during test time. I must be some kind of genius. ;)"

All kidding aside, I am thinking about transferring. Every time I sit in my Sociology class waiting for someone to answer the professor's less-than-intriguing-definitely-not-hard-to-answer questions, I want to put a bullet through my head. It's the first time a class has ever made me want to kill myself. Eventually, either me or Kathleen or one of those really-eager-to-be-A-students-but-aren't-particularly-smart kids in the front row will raise their hands.

I am one of the founding class of English 201 Advanced. And yet these 'advanced' students have trouble finding similarities between two short poems. Each had about three short stanzas and were nowhere near Homer or Shakespeare. One was "The Red Wheelbarrow," for crissakes! As much as I love the professor's 50 pgs of sophisticated reading per week, I really doubt the class really understands or appreciates the material. Do you know what these kids came up with for the poems? "Oh, both of them have the word 'chicken'!" and "Oh, this is about the cycle of economy, right? (Gary Soto's poem) And this one is about a wheelbarrow. A wheel is a circle like a cycle!" Kill me now. Just. Kill. Me. Now.


This is fucking COLLEGE.

And it is this unbelievable situation that makes me want to give up. It doesn't make me want to work harder and give it my all. It makes me want to do the opposite. I can barely get up the energy to do anything. It doesn't matter in the long run. In this institution, the dim-witted hard workers will get the same or higher grade than the smart kids. Just because we don't have to work as hard to understand a freaking poem. God.


Now that I finally decide I want to look into transferring, I see that Columbia only accepts those with less than 4 semesters at other institutions, preferably one or 2. Guess what? That means right now! But stupid me, due to the unfortunate side effects mentioned in the above paragraph, I have a 3.3 GPA from my first semester of four classes. My lowest grade was a B- which frankly, I expected to fail because I fell so far behind. Damn it. I have no idea what I'm gonna do. If I'm going to transfer, I'm getting out of CUNY (City University of New York - a group of community, lower, and senior colleges that belong to the City of New York, aka public insititutions), otherwise there's no point in transferring at all. Too bad Macauley (CUNY Honors Program at various CUNY colleges) doesn't accept transfers.


Grrraagh.


(Yes, I came back and went on a smiley rampage. 3/17/10)

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I don't really know why.

The latest ketchup
I got a MyTouch. ;)
I'm listening to Pandora more than my ipod shuffle.
I'm finally starting to use my Google Reader (RSS).
I'm on Facebook way more often because I'm automatically connected through aforementioned device.
Internet at home is still not working, a.k.a. unreliable, therefore I use my new technological gift to access the internet. I don't like accessing the 'Tang from there so sorry. =/

What else...can't think of anything.
See ya'll!

@thaitanic: I don't really know how to feel with your "for your age" comment... Given that I am NOT like others my age, nor do I fit in with those older than I because of ageism. Eh. *shrug*

To all a good night.

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I can feel it. Building up inside of me. A kind of aggression, but good for you. Taking control. "It's my life!" he cried. "Take that!" Finally able to do what had always been planned, then sacrificed, now alive again.

Snowballing. I don't mean the process of squishing soft wet snow between your gloved fingers forming finger-printed lumps of snow. I mean...the accumulation, the slipping and sliding of things going too fast, snatching more kisses than there are left in the Hershey's bag because they're just too good and you know soon there will be none left and you can't decide if that is a good or bad thing and you keep taking them anyway because they're so good, too good to be bad so you keep eating it anyway. This accumulation just keeps going and you see the bottom of the bag but isn't empty yet and you don't know when it will be.

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Ketchup:

- Bought my first pair of boots! (Aerosole Infamous, black leather, on sale at Macy's ♥)
- I cannot believe classes are starting next week. Damn it! Where did the time go? I know, WORKING. asdfjkl;
- I'm getting pretty serious about Law School. A lot of prep. And I'm a lower freshman. Good or bad thing?
-Rebuilding of self-confidence, sense of self/identity, self-growth, and will to live is going quite well! I have come far since my days of depression. Yes, it is the first time I have mentioned it. Correct me if I am wrong?

Oops, laptop running out of battery. Toodles~

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After much writer's block, I wrote something. I had been avoiding the topic for a long time. I wrote about it in my personal statement to get into the program, but they were adamantly against discussing our previous statements. Which of course ended up making me very wishy washy about writing about that topic again. And...other stuff. Anyway, I wrote it and got second place. Whatever. How the hell am I supposed to compete with a girl who has a schizophrenic mother?

Blah. At work. I haven't had lunch and I still need to work. =(

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when it's not even an actual semester/class? we're not being graded on this. this is really just for us. but i feel like it hasn't really helped me much. >.>

ok, i have to write my final law school personal statement tonight. it's 10:31 pm and i'm officially gonna start working on it now. i still have writer's block. i'm STUCK. and i gotta give it in tomorrow. *sigh* the program's faculty will be reading it...

ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

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